A Peak Inside A New Delhi Emergency Room

Day 2 of our “Incredible India” trip found us waiting around in the big buzzing capital city’s ER. Definitely not a place either of us had checked off on our sites to see. It all started with a sneaky beer, a little bit of rain, slippery flip-flops, marble stairs, a Sikh temple, and Rhys Farrow. Poor Guy.

For our first real night in India, we met a few travelers and even found our own Indian tour guide for a little exploration of Delhi’s nightlife. After a few beers and a previously long day of travel, we were all wiped and decided to call it a night. On the ride back to the guest house our “tour guide” jolted us off the highway and escorted us into one of Delhi’s extraordinary temples. It’s called the Golden Temple.. and for obvious reasons. It’s covered in gold and a beautiful site to see. It was even more impressive at 1am when the temple came to life with night lights that made the gold-plated roof shimmer. We got out of the car and Ali (our insanely friendly and upbeat ‘guide’ for the night) warned us to be quiet because we all had the remnants of Kingfisher beer on our breath. About 5 minutes after the warning, we were walking down the temple’s entrance stairs when I heard a loud girlish shriek. “AHHH!” Oh, no. I looked behind to see Rhys laying on the pavement– camera in the air. He slipped and managed to hit his ass on all 4 steps leading down to the entrance. He sacrificed his bootay for the camera which surprisingly was not damaged. What a guy! He limped around the temple, we took our photos, and got back to our room to find a nice big orange-shaped lump on his right butt cheek. We had a few giggles about the ridiculousness of the situation, went to sleep, and awoke to find a grapefruit replacing the orange. His butt was black, blue, and purple. A black hole of darkness was protruding from his bum. Neither of us could believe how much it grew. Against his wishes, we caught a cab to the emergency room. He couldn’t walk, couldn’t sit, and it was only getting bigger.

What an experience the hospital was! I was expecting to walk in and see a white room lined with chairs and sad faces of the hurt, ill, miserable, sick, poor, all waiting to be seen. Instead we walked into a room of hospital beds. There was no waiting room. Just beds everywhere and not one empty. Organized chaos, but chaos nonetheless. A container of used needles was left on a counter, the walls were dirty, the floor was gross, the place was a mess. Rhys hobbled over to a bed, the sheets were unchanged. When he requested the fresh blood stained bed sheets be changed the caretaker actually grimaced at us. What a ridiculous complaint, a clean bed sheet?!? A doctor came over to have a look at Rhys and I thought he was just another patient. Doctors wore no uniforms. They were all in jeans and a polo top. He pulled down Rhys’s pants and the entire room all had their eyes on the Welsh man’s purple ass. The doctor didn’t pull the privacy curtain for him! Everyone started leaning over to have a look and a nice “ohhh-ahhhh” at the now HUMONGOUS BRUISE. The bruise was taking over his entire right buttock. His ENTIRE cheek looked like a big gaping black hole galaxy that was starting on his butt and eventually taking over the world. I’m not exaggerating, it was bad. He’s a champ though and never complained or said much about it. However, everyone in the waiting room who began strolling over to have a peek couldn’t stop gawking at it. A girl hooked up to an oxygen machine next to him actually giggled at probably her first & last site of a foreigner’s bum.

I ran down the hall to pay for x-rays and brought the receipt to prove payment so he could be taken back for them. Cost was $6.00, he had 4 x-rays. At least healthcare is affordable! Thankfully, the x-rays brought some good news, nothing was broken. I  was standing in the hall while Rhys had his pictures taken & I couldn’t believe the site in front of me. A hall packed with sick, crying, panicked, dirty, and confused people. One guy in particular was in a hospital bed that was left unattended in the hall. He had an orange cast on his leg to his knee and below that a wooden rod sticking out where his leg should have been. People were knocking into his bed, rushing around him, and by the looks of it he had just got out of surgery. No recovery room. Another woman lay next to him in a bed gasping for air while someone down the hall was painting and filling the hall with a horrible chemical smell. People were everywhere. Dirt was everywhere, the electricity flicked on and off– we just wanted to get out of there. However, the doctors wanted him to stay the night. Yea, right! Against doctor’s wishes we took antibiotics and headed to the guest house for some R&R. The doctor actually took a picture of his big black bootay on his cell phone to show Rhys just how bad it was while trying to convince him to stay.

I will say that the doctors were fine, all seemed well-educated, and all spoke perfect English. A hospital in India functions like everything else in this crazy city. It’s organized chaos that makes sense for the people living here, but for an outsider we were completely overwhelmed with everything and the look of the place. Hopefully that’ll be our last trip to the ER!

BEWARE of MARBLE STAIRS.

bruise

OUCH! The 3rd Black Butt Cheek

UPDATE! After my dad saw this above photo, well, he freaked. As he should have, because 3 weeks later & the bruise was gone but a HUGE hematoma was still GROWING on his butt. We went back to an even SMALLER emergency room. Told the doctors what needed to be done. They gave me a SHOPPING LIST. 1 pair of gloves. 1 needle & syringe. 1 band-aid. While Rhys was sitting on the hospital bed I went across the street and bought all the supplies! Crazy?! The doctor took out 1 cup of butt blood. Fingers crossed the giant baseball on his right butt cheek goes away.

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